CONVERSATION #3
topic: Color Blind
One of our many messy conversations about race
Early 'color-blind' conversation.
AJ responds to Kerra's criticism of race in Sekret Machines in an Amazon.com review…
A.J.
I've been thinking about the issue of drawing attention to color since you raised it. It's more complicated than I thought when you have no omniscient 3rd person narrator. When everything comes from a narrative voice which is close to a character, you have to write the way the character experiences the world. So, for instance, it would make no sense in 1940s Europe to ever point out that a character was white. Everyone was white, pretty much. If someone WASN'T, it would be noted.
The larger issue, then, puts politics and writing slightly at odds. White people don't notice race in other white people. They notice it in non white people. Sad, but true.
Does that make sense? It doesn't invalidate the complaint about race only showing up when it's non white, but it explains--in part--why it happens here, I think.
Kerra
Then you risk alienating readers of color and you potentially end up writing for only white people. Is that what you want?
I asked a friend who was born and raised in Nigeria and spent much of her adult life abroad, about how she felt about the issue. She said she also feels her 'otherness' when writers do that…
I didn't say you shouldn't racially indicate other characters, I said there were more subtle ways I thought to do it. But it's your work and you have a right to write it in whatever you think is best. I cannot argue with your approach. You've written best-selling books. I've written none. So I defer to your judgment, even if I might not agree with it.
A.J.
No, but the alternative is to minimize race, no? As I say, the problem is one of political ends conflicting with narrative instinct, at least in the case of 1st person or limited 3rd person writing.
I'm just thinking aloud about an issue, not really defending a position. It's a conundrum.
Kerra
And so now we're back to color-blind vs. non-color blind.
A.J.
Right.
Kerra
And I didn't think you were being defensive. I trust you enough to know that's not the case.
A.J.
Thanks ☺
Kerra
To say 'I don't see race' is insulting and to say I 'only see race' is insulting.
A.J.
Yes. Exactly. In truth, thinking this stuff through makes me rethink a lot of what I've already done. Some of it I'd like to take back and give it another shot, but I guess that's what future books are for ☺
Kerra
When you first met me two years ago at the writer's conference did you see race even though the only reason I came was to talk to you about re-imagining Hamlet as a black woman?
A.J.
I saw it, of course. But that's not all I saw, and I felt that we met--albeit cautiously--as allies ☺
Kerra
I didn't see you as white. I saw you as a Shakespeare professor.
Now I have a fondness for Shakespeare professors because mine was the first man and first white person to really 'see' me and give me the confidence to explore as a budding writer and thinker.
A.J.
Interesting. But really, you didn't see me as white?
Kerra
No, not at all. Why would I?
I didn't want you to think I was a complete crazy person to suggest such a thing…
The tequila breakfast that I posted about two days ago...I was having a liquid breakfast with two, southern white men from eastern North Carolina. When I say southern, I mean they ooze dark liquor and barbecue from their pores. But I don't think of them as white. I think of them as my crazy ass friends. And when I first met them 15 years ago, I thought of them as crazy lobbyists.
A.J.
But you were aware of my whiteness, no? It was one of the things you knew about me. Or was it not? (I don't deduce anything from this either way. I'm just curious)
Kerra
I was more aware of your Britishness.
A.J.
I see. So it's almost a choice. Or a prioritizing of other factors.
Right. Yes. I see
Kerra
Laughing...I just had a revelation.
Maybe I'm like the reader...in life, I just assume everybody is white unless otherwise indicated.
A.J.
I tend to assume people of color are more alert to color in others rather than less. Another stereotype torpedoed.
Jesus. How do we get through life not knowing this stuff?
Kerra
It depends on the situation. Is it a social situation or a professional one? What are my surroundings? Do I perceive a threat?
A.J.
Huh. Right.
Kerra
Once upon a time, like three years ago, when I was nearly engaged to the guy I went to high school with, he frequently said he didn't 'see color' when we went to high school. He is obviously white.
And my response every time he said it, besides to hit him upside the head was to say, 'You didn't see color because you didn't have to.'
You didn't grow up knowing this stuff because you didn't have to.
A.J.
Yes. That's all I got.
Kerra
It's all you need.